Blood N' Guts. - 2004-03-02 10:45 p.m.

Oh! Oh! Who did our clinical instructor choose to scrub into the OR for a trwin ceasarean birth tonight? Me, that's who! I rule. Just for observation, but I'm still in love. I'm completely going into the OR. I also said that the first time I rotated into Psych and the ER, but I mean it this time. Maybe.

And now for something completely different. I've decided to become a nun. I'm tired of sitting here, offering my heart in outstretched arms, while all I hear in response is "Oh man, it really really sucks being single. I wish I had a girlfriend." Boo. Boo on you.

I'm NOT Ready For My Close-Up! - 2004-03-01 11:18 p.m.

So this evening in the photo lab, we're making reprints of particularly sexy portraits. I'm talking about a partially-clad catholic schoolgirl uniform, completely with lollipop and ruffly panties. Actually pretty cute. Anyway, co-worker Mike spent some time afterward in an attempt to convince me to engage in a similar photo shoot. Me. Schoolgirl uniform. Lollipop. Ruffly panties (or none at all!). An interesting idea with a close friend/more-than-friend, but not one I'd be comfortable with in the presence of...not a stranger, but definitely someone I'm not intimate with. Michelle keeps saying he has the hots for me. Maybe it's true.

That doesn't matter, anyway. The person I do want only wants me with my pants off, the person I'd settle for is too busy for me, and most everyone else is gay. Boo. And then my hotmail account is down, so I can't tell Mr. Wonderful he's wonderful, I can't see if Mr. Okay has decided to grace me with his presence, and I can't long-distance council Mr. and Ms. SillyPants. Sure, I could pick up the phone and call them (or even drive over to Mr. Wonderful's), but that takes too much effort. The internet is destroying my communication skills. Whatever happened to telephones?

P.S. - Academy Award note: Congrats to Pete Jackson. And 'Lijah Wood looked edible.

Confessions of a Non-So-Dangerous Mind. - 2004-02-28 10:18 p.m.

- If they didn't look so stupid on me, I'd wear a beret every day of my life.

- I have a difficult time getting along with other girls/women. There are really only three I enjoy being with (not counting my mother): my sister, Alyssa, and Michelle from work.

- Guilty pleasure: boys wearing eyeliner and nail polish. Yow-zah.

- I'm addicted to Degrassi: The Next Generation. Fifteen-year-olds in love triangles excite me.

- My other favorite but embarassing television program: Talk Sex with Sue Johanson. Sue demonstrating sexual positions with those little wooden artists' models - lovely.

- I have small breasts. Sometimes I wear falsies.

- I've been having sex dreams about Jimmy Buffett. I'm a fan, but do not find him terribly attractive.

- I love to talk during movies, but get very irate if someone four rows down is quietly whispering.

- I secretly love reading slashy fan fiction. (Translation: Stories involving your favorite movie/book/tv characters in hot, homosexual embraces. Same sex hobbit lovin' = yummy.)

Whew. That was cathartic. Glad I got it off my chest.

The tights! Oh, the tights. - 2004-02-24 1:47 p.m.

Best picture ever (courtesy Tricky and The Bag End Inn):

I nearly peed my pants, it was so surreally hilarious. Elijah Wood as King Bacchus at Mardi Gras, presiding over his parade. Haha. Dom Monaghan also had his own parade, as King Orpheus, but the pics weren't quite so funny.

My Monster! - 2004-02-22 10:14 p.m.

Just finished watching the SAG awards with Gabe. A few notes.

1) Liv Tyler's cat-eye glasses were lovely. Very Lisa Loeb.

2) Renee Zellweger looks so much better with "meat on her bones". She was so emaciated in Chicago, it made me ill.

3) Johnny Depp = Best Film Actor. Very interesting, considering the SAG and Academy voter pool consists of (mostly) the same people.

4) Sean Astin's tirade on keeping movie production in the United States, not taking overseas jobs, etc. Sean, for LotR, you spent 16 months in primary photography in New Zealand, plus two additional winters of re-shoots and ADR. Hypocritical much?

5) Billy Boyd wore one of his kilts. I spent the evening trying to look under it.

6) Elijah Wood and Dom Monaghan were too busy livin' it up at Mardi Gras to attend. Damn them.

In other news, Gabe is buying a house in Louisville. A big house, with four bedrooms to rent out to roommates. Meaning I can move to Louisville. Meaning I am job shopping in Louisville soon. Huzzah!

E! Interviewer: "What's under your kilt?"
Billy Boyd: "My monster!"

Shiny, Shiny Brass Buttons. - 2004-02-20 3:02 p.m.

Dom Monaghan was scheduled to appear on Jimmy Kimmel's talk show last night. I decided to set aside my difference with Mr. Kimmel and view his interview with my very favorite hobbit. I stayed awake half the night to watch that misogynistic oaf's show, and Dom wasn't even on! Change of schedule! Boo!

I did really well on my exam today. I am officially not failing Pharmacology anymore. Whee!

After class today, there was a (mandatory) voluntary meeting with an army recruiter. Boo! Boo on that! Why are they recruiting on college campuses anyway? It doesn't seem like a place full of potential soldiers to me. A few years ago I flirted with the idea of the Navy, enticed by a station in Hawaii and those shiny, shiny brass buttons on their uniforms. After I realized you couldn't pick your station and you can buy shiny, shiny brass buttons at Wal-Mart, I dropped the idea. I later learned the armed forces won't accept suicide attemptees, anyway. I made the mistake of being in the first row during the little recruiter-man's (that's a technical term, you know) spill. The recruiter-man used me for all his examples, and at the end of his tirade, kept asking me what was keeping me from signing up. To force him to back off, I did everything I could short of shouting "I'M A FORMER SUCICIDE ATTEMPTEE!" in front of my classmates. I hate that recruiter-man.